


baby blue

by Yeehawbby



Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: Angst and Tragedy, Dialog heavy, Drug Abuse, Drug Addiction, I dont know how to tag, M/M, Taeil is Haechans dad, a lot of time skips, ahaha, johnny is taeyongs best friend, meth, yuta is lonely and desperate
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-03
Updated: 2020-07-03
Packaged: 2021-03-05 04:00:01
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,286
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25048042
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Yeehawbby/pseuds/Yeehawbby
Summary: Yuta slowly flows back into normal life. still not on speaking terms with his parents, but Taeil and his son Donhyuck sometimes come to visit. Taeil always  calls Yuta an hour before just to ask him to clean up a little bit (which means “put the goddamn drugs away”). which is nice of him. but regarding drugs, it all stayed the same- pot and meth. Yuta doesn’t want anything else but to smoke and maybe fuck the goth boy next door.
Relationships: Lee Taeyong/Nakamoto Yuta
Kudos: 7





	baby blue

**Author's Note:**

> heyaaa! write this in one sitting late at night, so excuse the grammar and punctuation mistakes 
> 
> this can be triggering for some people so beware

Yuta has many problems. 1- his parents kicked him out 2- his best friend Taeil can’t shelter him because taeil has a kid, 3- Yuta is a drug addict.

god _damit!_ Yuta internally screams as he looks for places to stay. all of them are either too expensive or just too preppy for him. after what felt like hours of mindless searching for a place he clicks an advertisement- a nice apartment with enough space to chill, a nice bedroom and a little garden.   
“sick” he mumbles 

as Yuta pulls into the drive way, he notices a young man, standing near the door waiting for him. Yuta can’t not notice the boys style- kind of rockish with some pastel touches.   
he walks to the stylish man   
“hey..”

  
the man unenthusiastically answers 

  
“hi, i’m Taeyong. i’m going to show you the place”

  
as Taeyong explains every room in the apartment Yuta finds himself just nodding, at this point he doesn’t care, he just wants live somewhere.

  
“alright alright! just let me sign the documents already!” Yuta yells in frustration 

  
“good. now the last thing you need to know. this is a strictly no smoking zone. and i live next door, just so you know” Taeyong pushes the paper to the other man. 

  
“alright then” Yuta answers tiredly

  
“you have any furniture?” Taeyong asks the white haired boy 

  
“nah, just some pillows, CDs, and some other knick knacks”

  
“oh well” Taeyong starts walking around, fidgeting with a coin. 15 months was written on it. but he puts it back into the pockets of his black jeans.

  
“ i guess, we’re done here.”

  
“yep” 

“good”

  
“am i going to pay you or?”

  
“ah yes, do you have a checking account? or are going to pay with a credit card?”

  
“ahah- neither. i’m going to pay cash”

  
“you’re going to pay with cash? the amount is 6500 plus all the security deposits so that rounds up to 7100”

  
“uhu, here” Yuta flips through a thick roll of 100s. and hands them to the other man.

  
“well then. i guess now we’re really done”

  
“yeah” Yuta sighs in relief and sits on the wooden floor

  
“bye” Taeyong looks at the papers the new resident signed “Nakamoto Yuta”

  
he doesn’t answer, but looks at his landlord with a sly smirk. 

***

Yuta slowly flows back into normal life. still not on speaking terms with his parents, but Taeil and his son Donhyuck sometimes come to visit. Taeil always calls Yuta an hour before just to ask him to clean up a little bit (which means “put the goddamn drugs away”). which is nice of him. but regarding drugs, it all stayed the same- pot and meth. Yuta doesn’t want anything else but to smoke and maybe fuck the goth boy next door.

***

after all chips and cheetos ended Yuta decides to step out only to find Taeyong outside drawing something. he’s wearing a usual black graphic tee and jeans.

  
“hey” the goth boy speaks up  
  
“whats up? oh, new hair color. it really suits you” Yuta tries to get on his good side   
“thanks”  
  
“so what’re you drawing?” 

  
“oh just, a client requested a tattoo and i’m just kind of uninspired” Taeyong answers coldly

  
“um, if you’re down you can hang with me. i got all the things set. couch, TV, we can order food!”

  
“so like a date?”

  
“only if you want it to be” Yuta winks

  
Taeyong laughs with joy and walks over to the other boys’ door 

“oh- it’s a little messy” the boy next door adds

  
“oh i’m sorry, i’m not mr.Clean. no pun intended”

  
“you smoke pot?” 

  
“yeah, um don’t worry i won’t do it right now around you. i saw your coin. congratulations”

  
“thanks- “

  
“so uh, movie maybe?” the japanese male suggests 

  
“sure”

  
Yuta wakes up in bed with Taeyong, both of them naked. 

  
“hey you” 

  
“that was fun”

  
they kiss once again, before Taeyongs’ phone rings. he quickly answers it

  
“hey Johnny, yeah, yeah i’m almost ready to go. just give me 20 minutes”

  
“who’s that?” Yuta asks 

  
“that’s my best friend John. he’s going to take me to the meeting. you know” Taeyong shrugs as he wiggles into his skinny jeans

  
“yeah. will you be long?”

  
“probably an hour and a half”

  
“good. i’ll see you then”

***

it’s been months since Yuta moved into the new place. Yuta starts to think about Taeyong and how they sleep together, how amazing Taeyongs’ slim body is, how gorgeous he is. Yuta never thought about committing to a person, he is used to shitty one-night stands, but this boy, who changes his hair color every two days, just might be the one. but his addiction to blue ice is still alive.  
Yuta knows how to make meth, he knows how to sell it, but he doesn’t know how to stop using it, even for Taeyong.   
  


***

  
“mom, please if you have nothing good to say to your son, just don’t say anything” Yuta yells at his phone.

his mom on the other line hangs up.  
“shit”

  
“oh hey-“

  
“hi, i didn’t know you’d come so early” the japanese man asks with surprise 

  
“yeah, are you not happy about that?” Taeyong shyly adds 

  
“no! i’m so happy you’re here, it’s just that i thought you’d come later, i thought of preparing something”

  
“oh thats nice of you”

  
“well, i guess we can watch a movie of something”

  
“sounds great”

as the couple sits on the sofa watching some shitty show, Yuta feels disgusting. what his mom said to him really upset the boy. it made all the repressed memories flood back. all he wants to do right now is smoke some ice

  
“listen- you should go” 

“what why?” Taeyong responds stunned

  
“i’m in a really bad place right now, i just want to smoke and i know that you’re in recovery so- just go”

Taeyong looks up to see Yuta walk back to the bedroom   
he’s conflicted. he doesn’t want to go, but if he doesn’t he’ll be sick. _i’ll just be with Yuta. i’m not going to take a hit_ he thinks walking to the bedroom door. as Taeyong opens the door, he can’t not do it. Taeyong breaks the promise of staying clean to Johnny, his parents but most importantly himself.

***

  
“Tae- baby”  
  
“mhm?”

  
“wake up”

  
Yuta has made some camomile tea (Taeyongs’ favorite) just to cheer up his boyfriend. he’s so beautiful when he sleeps, he’s so unaware of his beauty.

  
“Tae- lets get out. let’s do something. you wanted to go to a gallery or something”

  
Taeyong turns to face his caring boyfriend   
“sure”

  
but immediately after that he starts rummaging on the nightstand. soon enough he finds a bag filled with light blue crystals. Yuta doesn’t say anything. 

  
***

Taeyong steps into Yutas’ bedroom. he’s carrying something. he takes off his jumper and sits on the bed near his boyfriend. Taeyong takes out two syringes a little bronze ball, a silver spoon and some matches. Yuta doesn’t say anything for he is an addict and is blindly in love. 

Taeyong lights the gifted candle from Taeil, puts the spoon above the flame.   
  
“Tae- are you sure about this?” Yuta manages to stutter

  
“yeah” Taeyong whispers 

  
“is that- you know?”

  
“yes, Yuta it’s that. but i’d like to add some crystal to it”

  
Yuta is quiet. he is scared. he has done a lot of drugs, but heroin is the one he always said no to. 

  
“Yuta? Yuta!” taeyong mumbles with a full syringe in between his rosy lips

  
“huh?”

  
“it’s done. roll up your sleeve” Yuta does exactly that

  
“okay, now tie that belt around...here” Taeyong trances a line on Yutas forearm with his skinny finger. 

  
both of them quiet. nervous tension builds up in the room, but Yuta breaks the silence 

  
“how does it feel” he nods his head towards the needle

  
“chilly at first, then you’ll see for yourself”

Taeyong pushes the needle into Yutas vein. at first the boy feels a pinch, but then yuta feels light as cloud. he feels like he’s flying around the room like a ghost, like time is nothing but a word anymore. like love is Taeyong and his blue ice 

  
“just make sure to sleep on your side- you don’t want to choke on vomit”

  
Yuta wakes up. he feels dizzy and nauseous after last nights cocktails of narcotics. he extends his arm to feel if Taeyong is still with him. but he’s not. yuta sits up, the boys’ clothes are still here. 

  
“Taeyong?!”

  
“Yuta i’m here!” 

  
“why are there god damit?”

  
“i’m making coffee, do you want some?”

  
“sure”

  
“oh and also some guy left a voice mail”

  
“who?”

  
“i don’t know”

  
after hearing that Yuta quickly remembers who that can be. it’s Taeil. 

  
“shit!”

  
“what’s wrong, babe?”

  
“my friend Taeil is coming over, with his son. he can’t see this fucking mess”

  
“oh my god, don’t worry i’ll help you”

  
the couple starts maniacally cleaning up. but then some one knocks on the door. but not Yutas’ door, Taeyongs’ door

  
“crap. that’s Johnny” Taeyong chews on his lip in anxiety

  
“Johnny i’m here! just give me 5 minutes!”

  
“umm, alright” Johnnys voice echoed

  
after putting on the first thing he sees, Taeyong immediately runs to the door. 

  
“oh hi. you must be Yuta? i’ve heard a lot about you” Johnny says cheerfully, pointing at the japanese man 

  
“hey” Yuta nods 

  
“so uh- you’re ready to go?” the tall man asks Taeyong 

  
“i don’t want to go today” the boy shyly replies

  
“what?”

  
“i just don’t, okay!”

  
“Taeyong what happened?” 

  
“nothing for christ’s sake! i’m an adult who can make his own decisions!”

  
“did you- Taeyong WHY do you always do this”  
Taeyong stays quiet 

  
“you’ve been doing so good! and now you’re back at it?” Johnnys’ soft friendly voice grew louder and more aggressive 

  
“it’s you, you’re the reason why.” the tall man points at Yuta with dread and anger

  
before the couple could say anything Johnny barges in. he walks towards the living room only go find empty syringes and packets of blue meth.

  
“that’s it! Lee Taeyong you’re coming to the clinic! now!”

  
“what no!”

  
“yes. IMMEDIATELY”

  
“Johnny please-“

  
“NO MORE EXCUSES!” 

  
“hey man, stop fucking yelling at him” Yuta steps in 

  
“Johnny. i’m so sorry. i’m so so so sorry, but please not right now”

  
“then when? i don’t want you to die from an overdose. if this motherfucker does, then sure go at it. stay here with this junkie”

  
“John. i swear i will come to the clinic with you tomorrow. please just give me a day” Taeyong begs

  
“alright then” Johnny exhales from all the pent up anger and walks away toward the door, giving Yuta an angry glare.

  
as soon as the man closes the door Taeyong runs to Yuta for a hug. a hug that says a thousand words.

“well, i guess i have to go to work now” Taeyong checks the time 

  
“you do?”

  
“yeah, the tattoo place. my client is there”

  
“oh good luck!” Yuta places a small peck on Taeyongs’ lips 

  
“thank you” Tae walks out the door  
  
***

“so.. Yuta” Taeil starts “how is your love life? i see you have someone else’s clothes here” he points at a crop-top and skinny jeans

  
“well, uhhhh, i’m dating a guy”

  
“well i figured that” the older man chuckles

  
“he lives next door, he’s the apartment manager i guess”

  
“are you two close? or is it just a fling?”

  
“we’re very close! why do you ask that?”

  
“i’m just looking out for ya”

  
“how’s Hyuck?” Yuta changes the topic 

  
“oh i’m glad you asked! he’s doing great, although he’s a little bit scared to cut his hair, so we’re embracing the ponytail right now”

  
“at least it’s not a rat tail” Yuta smirks 

  
“Yuta, i want to ask you a serious question. are you using again? i’m not judging”

  
“Taeil.... yes, i am”

  
Taeil sighs 

  
“i think that’s your call to leave” Yuta stands up and points at the door  
  
“i guess so” the other man walks out of the living room

  
“hey um, just know that we care for you” Taeil says and leaves Yutas’ apartment building 

***

“Yuta!! i’m back!” Taeyong yells through the door

  
“come in” the man runs to the door

  
“are you okay?” 

  
“yeah, it’s just it’s our last day together”

  
“well, let’s have a good time” the boy with bright hair mischievously responds

  
“what do you mean?”

  
“let’s fly to heaven tonight” Taeyong deeply kisses Yuta. the japanese boy is fascinated by Taeyong and his raw desires

before inserting the needle in his light purple vein Yuta looks up to see Taeyongs’ new hair color. he knows his boyfriend changed it all the times but this time it’s baby blue. 

  
“you’re beautiful- you know that?” Yuta softly whimpers as the euphoric liquid enters his cardiovascular system.

  
“i know babe” Taeyong quickly answers injecting himself with the same heavenly mixture. 

Yuta wakes up. _shit. it’s 2 pm already. well i guess we have nothing to do anyway_ he notes mentally. and reaches to comb Taeyongs’ colorful hair, but instead touches his ear. Yuta rolls over to see Taeyong laying on his back strings of spit and vomit dribble from the boys mouth.

  
“Tae?! holy fuck?! TAE?!” Yuta jumps up. not fully processing the situation he starts to preform CPR 

  
“Tae — please...” the man keeps pushing on his boyfriends’ chest with no result

  
“PLEASE WAKE UP” yuta cries 

  
“please baby- please i love you so much- please Taeyong-“ Yuta sobs, not giving up

time passed. Yuta with blood-shot eyes and dried tear lines calls the only person he has left

  
“Taeil, Taeyong died” 


End file.
